Sigma, into battle: which men dared to compete with alpha males
Couch commentators and online pseudo-analysts mention men with a gentle nature in the categories of "masiki", "skoofs" and even "tubes" more often than alpha males, and domineering milfs confidently overtake other groups of the fair sex in popularity. Izvestia experts analyzed the situation and tried to figure out whether online trends reflect the real situation, and what will happen if the fashion for infantile husbands and dominant wives persists.
Milf or skater
The specialists of the analytical agency "Pressindex" studied the slang of zoomers (born in 1997-2012) and alpha (born in 2013 and later). 50 terms used in social networks to characterize representatives of the male and female sex. The experts took a time interval of six months. It turned out that the popularity of digital masculinity archetypes is changing.
The Izvestia news agency explained that the image of the alpha male, which previously dominated the hierarchy of "real men," is losing ground. Sigma is now more often mentioned — a man who has given up the race for leadership in the social hierarchy, but retains charisma and attractiveness. He is followed by masik, who is gentle, caring, and focused on a woman's comfort, courtship, and gifts. And skuf closes the top three — the complete opposite of dominant men.
Alpha and gigachad, who aspires to demonstrate masculinity, were even overtaken by Tubik, an infantile young man who cannot stand up for himself.
Among the female archetypes, the milf is confidently in the lead — a mature, sexy, self-confident woman. Altushka and skeet girl are following her with a huge lag.
The agency stressed that gender slang is no longer the prerogative of teenagers. Russians between the ages of 25 and 45 are the most active users of the new language. But women often mention the same masks and tubes with irony.
Is it worth giving importance to such characteristics? Despite all the external frivolity, this topic falls into the existential field, that is, the direct survival of civilization depends on it, says clinical psychologist and sexologist Sergey Volkov.
— At all times, people have classified the environment by characteristics. For the opposite sex, the main characteristic is the determination of fitness for childbearing. This mechanism works through sexuality," says Volkov.
The virtual world and reality are two spheres that are intertwined and are in such a fusion that it is sometimes difficult to determine where one ends and the other begins, says Anna Guseva, a practicing psychologist. But, according to the expert, the Network is not an exact copy of life, but rather its distorted reflection.
In the virtual world, the most vivid manifestations receive disproportionately much attention. So youth slang focuses only on the most prominent types. Many people don't fit into this framework.
Anna Guseva emphasizes that it is social networks that become a platform for the emergence of new ideas and values. They reflect certain aspects of reality at a stage when social trends are just emerging. In particular, the popularity of the same sigma, masikov and MILF in youth slang really indicates a change in attitudes towards some traditions.
But when analyzing online trends, the psychologist advises to take into account that users of social networks do not represent the general population. After all, this is the youngest and most urbanized part of society. And online trends are short-lived and may not reflect any long-term social change, as life is constantly changing and moving forward.
Masks and tubes
As for the new look at men, the relegation to the background of the image of the alpha male, according to experts, is understandable. Intuitively, young people choose more accessible behaviors for themselves, says Anna Guseva.
— Conforming to the image of a "real man" is constant self—improvement, discipline, overcoming, and conquest. Therefore, the path of least resistance is to become sigma or gigachad. And masik can generally afford to be vulnerable, show emotions and cry, and not hide his interests, even if they are not considered purely masculine, the psychologist argues.
According to Sergey Volkov, alpha males are the most active men, people of action, fighters and winners, the core of society's development. They ensure its security, well-being and sovereignty. But the problem is that alpha males are impossible to control. Living with such a man means obeying his rules and his will. The husband is a breadwinner, and the wife in the kitchen and with the children is about the alpha family. But modern women don't like such men. Moreover, technology has simplified life, and a woman with a good salary can afford not to obey anyone.
The sexologist believes that sigma originated as a response to women ignoring alpha males. In fact, sigma is alpha, which has adapted to the demands of freedom and personal security on the part of women and refused to compete.
— Sigma is not interested in politics, does not act in the interests of society or the group. They are individualists, but they still actively promote and defend their interests, which makes them resourceful and attracts women. Sigma is a dream come true of partnership and equality, but such men easily abandon women and children, go only for their interests," says the sexologist.
The sigma man does not want to take responsibility for a real relationship. Everything is equal, which means that a woman's problems are her problems. Sigma is nearby as long as it is convenient for him, summarizes the sexologist.
— Masik is a consequence of a gender fracture. He was raised in a single-parent family, and had no access to men's societies, companies, or interests. He attended a music school, an art club, and dancing, but everything related to aggression (like boxing and fighting) was limited to his mother with the good intention of raising a "normal man", not like "these louts," Sergei Volkov believes.
From the point of view of a sexologist, masiki is a generation of men born in the era of the 90s, when the gender institute of masculinity in society practically did not work, and no one taught these boys to be men.
"Men are calm, helpful, put a woman's problems and her comfort above their own, and feel guilty if a woman is unhappy," comments Volkov. — At the beginning of a relationship, they seem perfect, even better than sigma, because they are involved in women's interests, put their lives on the back burner and live solely by the goals of their wife and her ideas about family.
But masik is deprived of independence, and in a difficult situation he gets lost and needs support. A woman doesn't get a husband, but a son, which affects relationships, especially her sex life, Volkov emphasizes.
— The wife gets tired of being the mother of an adult and she starts demanding the "impossible" from her husband: to remember that a man should be stronger than a woman, — comments Volkov. — As a rule, such a couple breaks up on the initiative of a woman, because masik would not dare to take such a step.
Tubes are infantile young men aged 16-22 who grew up in an era of complete material well—being and carefree, these are typical zoomers.
— They do not know that resources need to be extracted and sometimes taken away from others (for example, at an interview), they do not understand the consequences and responsibilities. Their life is an infantile position, elevated to the absolute. It's great to hang out with them, have fun, and chat, but that's all," says Volkov.
Tubes attract the same infantile girls. As a result, an unviable family is created, which cannot solve even simple household tasks without parental control, the expert warns. Such a social unit resembles the friendship of children in a sandbox.
A gigachade is, according to the sexologist, an attempt by men to restore biological hierarchy and order. This character emphasizes his brutality in every possible way: he lets go of his beard and rocks his muscles, trying to attract attention to himself.
— "Chad" is a sexually attractive man, and the prefix "giga" means emphasizing masculine features. But these attempts are most often ridiculed by women. After all, being a man is about dignity and respect, not about a harsh appearance. If the emphasis on masculine features is not supported by anything, then such a brutal person can be accused of chauvinism and misogyny. There is even a term "toxic masculinity," explains the sexologist.
Scoofs have become an object of hatred and constant ridicule on the Internet, but this social image is not so bad, psychologists believe.
— This is a man with a standard set of interests — family, fishing, work, cottage, relaxing on the couch, trips to the mall. He doesn't follow trends, he doesn't try to make an impression. Skuf just lives: solves simple tasks, enjoys simple joys, accepts the world as it is, without illusions and high expectations," comments Anna Guseva.
According to the psychologist, the skoofs are good partners, kind fathers, and can do jobs that require patience and responsibility. Without them, society would be unstable.
— The value of skoof in the era of information and visual noise, as well as the constant race for novelty, is that he does not pretend to be who he is not. And this is a very healthy position. The object of scoofs' ridicule is the zoomers' fear of the mundane and routine," explains Guseva.
The main problem of the scoofs is that they have given up the initiative and actively fight for their positions, so their sons will not get the opportunity to see the experience of a successful parent, Sergei Volkov believes. And there is a risk that the generation of those who will achieve, fight and conquer new heights will simply not appear, and with this the decline of civilization may begin.
Choose me
Female types in youth slang are a psychological analysis of modern images that are dictated to us by Western fashion, advertising or online publications, emphasizes Anna Guseva. But milf, altushka and skater are not just funny words, but a reflection of the interests of real people.
— Milf is the strength and confidence of a mature woman. Key characteristics are healthy self—esteem, high emotional maturity, acceptance of oneself, one's body, and life experience. Young people are intuitively drawn to this image as to emotional stability and identity, which is lacking in their age group," the psychologist comments.
According to her, many representatives of the Z-generation feel that their childhood and youth are artificially delayed by society. Interest in mature women is a way to psychologically distance oneself from imposed infantilism, to finally become an adult. Young people pay attention to MILFs also because they, like scoofs, are characterized by stability, understanding, and sincerity.
— Milf is the most common and desirable type for all men. She is not only able to compete with the girls, but is also ahead of them by a huge margin. The vast majority of PornHub requests are in the MILF category," the sexologist confirms.
Sergey Volkov draws attention to the fact that men on Russian dating sites put the age of their desired partner 5-6 years older than their own, explaining this by the fact that their peers cannot even maintain a dialogue. It's boring and uninteresting with young people, and you have to put a lot of effort into talking — "like rolling a square," the expert sums up.
— But young men have a fantasy that if you satisfy a MILF sexually, then in return she will take care of them and provide everything they need. In reality, these women, like their young rivals, do not need another child, but a strong partner, warns the sexologist.
Eternal teenage altushki have mixed all the informal styles of clothing and self-expression, get tattoos, get piercings, and dye their hair in all kinds of colors. According to Guseva, they mask the fear of being like everyone else and self-doubt with external attributes, but this does not always lead to a healthy result. So, altushki lacks an important trait inherent in milfs — psychological maturity.
— In their clothes, you can find elements of various subcultures — from Goths and punks to gopnik 90s and even barbie-core. For them, personal freedom and self-expression are more important than public opinion and morality. The teenage protest of the altushkas is filled with romanticism and a craving for care. For men, this image is attractive, but men are in no hurry to build long—term relationships with such girls," the sexologist comments.
But the sexologist considers the so-called "skeet girls" to be one of the most hated images of the Internet. They like to meet men, visit restaurants and exhibitions at their expense, and receive gifts. At the same time, they demand attention and loyalty, despite a short acquaintance.
"Most of the time, it doesn't come to sex: a man just leaves a girl like that, feeling used," says Volkov. — Unlike representatives of the most ancient profession, who honestly determine the price for a service, skeet girls really think that this is what love looks like: a man gives her everything she wants, but he himself does not need anything from her, he is happy that the girl took the gift.
The expert believes that skeet girls are girls who are psychologically severely traumatized, not by violence or cruelty, but by the emotional coldness of their parents and even by good financial conditions. They suffer from dissatisfaction with life and the alleged "greed" of men. They tend to be insecure about their own worth. But sometimes girls who have nothing to do with this group become skaters within the framework of fashion trends, explains Anna Guseva.
The literal meaning of the word of popular pikmi girls is "choose me." Experts "blame" the deep infantilization of men for the appearance of this group of girls, because of which young men themselves are not able to choose a partner, so women try to attract attention to themselves by emphasizing positive traits.
— But, unlike gigachades, they emphasize not physical features, but social ones, — explains Sergey Volkov. — To do this, they have to rely on the humiliation of competitors — reducing the importance of other girls. Pikmi are sarcastic and bitchy. They surround themselves with women who definitely won't be better than them in order to look more advantageous against their background.
The expert warns that such behavior only repels men, who fear that Jimmy will behave the same way with them.
The studied gender characteristics are quite realistic, but experts do not recommend forcing someone into the framework of certain images.
— The Internet space is now ruled by likes and monetization. Consequently, something good and serious does not attract users, while something non-standard or psychologically painful is in demand. There are many healthy types in society. Their diversity is our wealth," Anna Guseva is sure.
The psychologist emphasizes that each person is a unique combination of intelligence, feelings, character, temperament and experience. It is this complexity that makes the world more interesting and richer.
Переведено сервисом «Яндекс Переводчик»
